Bond blog post enlightened parenting/education

     When thinking about how enlightenment applies to parenting, you automatically think about the types of parenting and the closeness between the parents and children. When researching it, you become inundated with information. There are religious ways to parent and ways that involve placing religion on the backburner. Ways to discipline your child or not to discipline your child. It all honestly boils down to this; many new parents hold almost unachievable expectations of being a parent and running a household. But, it is much different when you meet them in person, whether from birth or adoption. The health of a child and supporting a child in meeting their developmental milestones are the primary goals that remain true throughout parenthood. A parent will begin to learn patience by the boatload because children do not come with instructions, contrary to the extensive new parent section at Barnes and Noble.

    However, in conjunction with parenting, education is based upon value and passion for learning. The value that education holds to an individual will determine how successful they will be in the future. The second determining factor is passion or the approach to learning. If a child loves learning and devours books at any chance, there is a specific value placed on education along with a passion for learning. The value and passion will assist the child in learning new content such as a language and allow the child to be successful.

     Enlightened parenting focuses on the relationships and the connections between the child and the other parent. Parenthood is an opportunity like no other. It is a chance to reevaluate and reflect on your childhood and what your expectations are moving forward. The reflection also gives you a chance to connect with your partner as they will be doing the same on the journey to enlightened parenting. Being a new mother is a big deal, and the media makes it seem effortless. But there are big emotions with going back to work, not sleeping, and losing your identity in being a mother. Many expect to have a baby and reach goals one after another and return to work seamlessly. But the reality is much more complicated than the expectations. I lost my identity as a new mother meaning that I saw myself and what I enjoyed as being related to raising my child. I began putting work in once I realized that I lost myself becoming a mother, rediscovered my hobbies, and found new ones. I also felt a lot of guilt going back to work. Guilt is something that most women face when going back to work, and they begin to learn that it is okay to have a career and raise a child.

 

 

     Enlightened parenting connects to what we have learned this summer through the reading of Why grow up? by Susan Neiman. The book has a piece about growing up and dealing with your parents’ choices such as music, politics, and even religion. Over time, individuals can reflect on their parents’ choices and decide if they want to continue their parents’ choices or blaze their path with new outlooks and choices (108). The book also looks at the use of education. Corporal punishment and rote learning have been eliminated, for the most part, allowing learning to become student-centered. Education was meant to be valued for its role in society. The value and passion are shown in the example of a child learning a second language by ten. When a child learns a second language before the age of ten, it is easier for them to become multilingual because they have learned discipline and delay gratification (130). Rousseau’s ideas are so widely utilized that they are not even recognized as his anymore. However, the book touches on driving a child into submission in sitting and listening or encouraging inquiry. However, the children are in class sitting; they gain discipline and learn a delay of gratification. Kant saw discipline as a means to greater freedom (130). The skills learned will set them up for a successful future.   

 

 

 

The most crucial part is that enlightened parenting is relationship-based. I have noticed this as well in education. If there is no relationship there, the student will often not show up and work. The association gives the student confidence, trust, and respect. I operate on that theory at work and always aim to forge relationships with students to feel safe, confident, and respected. I work at a district that focuses on the whole child, which has some great tenets such as health, safety, engagement, and support. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Things to think about:

1. Did an enlightened parent raise you?
2.  Are you an enlightened parent?
3. How do you think that enlightenment and relationship-based connections can transfer to school systems to see more success for students?
4. Do you think that the students who drop out of school have not experienced enlightenment within the school or home?
5.    Did you go to a school where enlightenment was a priority?
6. If you have not had a child yet; what do you think about enlightened parenting?
7. Why do you think relationships are so essential in allowing children to feel confident?
8. Do you think that children sitting in class throughout the school day drive them into submission or encouraging inquiry?

 

 

References

 

Neiman, Susan. Why Grow up? Penguin Books, 2016.