Up@dawn 2.0 (blogger)

Delight Springs

Monday, November 24, 2025

Mady Perkins, section 2: Why Grow Up chapter 2

 Susan Neiman's Why Grow Up: Subversive Thoughts for an Infantile Age is a commentary and retort against the youth-obsessed culture we reside in. The strife for preserving youth and "turning back the clock" permeates our culture in many ways. Our consumer-focused economy manipulates this desire for youth and uses it to push products which claim to restore or promote youthfulness. Neiman's definition of maturity states that mature people have learned to cope with the difference in expectation and reality. Neiman establishes stages of life around a problem she calls the "is" vs "ought" problem. The "is" represents the reality of our world, one in which bad things happen, stirring many psychological and moral queries as we grow up. The "ought" is theoretically how the world should be, and the first version of the world we're presented with as children. Neiman uses the "is" vs "ought" problem to structure life into the following three phases: infancy/childhood, adolescence, and maturity. 

Infancy and childhood are where we are receptive of we're told and what we see. We are presented with the "ought" in this phase since we're so vulnerable and in need of guidance. Parents tend to be the ones leading and dictating our worldview in this stage. Consider this phase one of "childlike wonder."

Adolescence is where the "is" begins to enter our worldview. We tend to reject the is, however. Think of teenage rebellion when there begins to be a dissonance or disagreement with the reality and the expectations. We're seeing the flaws in the world for the first time.

Maturity is defined by moving past the rejection phase and accepting the "is." We still believe in how the world ought to be but accept how the world is. Believing in the "ought" keeps us motivated and uncynical. 

Neiman says that real growing up is choosing to see that the is and the ought are different and living with reality while not giving up on the way things should be. This is accomplished by internal belief sets that respond to the way the world is. Many choose pessimistic ways to handle the is vs ought but this is the wrong approach. More people should choose to use their perception of "ought" to change the is.

Often in our culture maturity is dulled and looked down upon. Growing up and growing old are defined by life accomplishments such as career, marriage, and children. Real maturity can be achieved by more than just milestones according to Susan Neiman. Infantilism exists because as life becomes more complex and serious the alleged antidote is to wish for youth and try to turn back the clock. This is where the consumerist culture enters the question—chasing a time when life was simple and easy to understand.

This cartoon speaks to the "is" vs "ought" problem since we choose which version of reality we focus on and accept. Calvin is also exhibiting adolescent rebellion since he's focusing on his version of what life ought to be... free of homework, that is.


This article talks about the obsession we have with youth in America. An interesting point that the author, Dale Archer, makes is that we don't value wisdom as much anymore. Due to the increased efficiency and reach of search engines and technology, we don't look to older, wiser people for answers anymore—they take too long. Now that technology is fast and attention span is short, we can become "experts" on anything in mere minutes and new is always better. When the aged population is no longer looked to for information, this is when we can see the shift to a beauty-obsessed mindset that values fast, fun, energetic youth over all else.
I wonder what this means for the future of Philosophy, the love of Wisdom. We're already seeing a decrease in support for the humanities in education settings while there's an uptick in technical fields like computer science, engineering, etc.

1 comment:

  1. Good. A few more links would be helpful, for instance exploring "youth culture" and the "is/ought" gap (as originally delineated by David Hume). And maybe say a bit more about why consumer culture wants us to idealize and embrace "a time when life was simple and easy to understand"...

    The cartoon is good, but it needs to be shrunk a bit. In edit mode, drag the borders in to fit the space.

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