A Discussion Between Zeno, Pyrrho, Epicurus, and Me
This imaginary conversation will analyze what I believe a discussion would consist of between three famous philosophers trying to convince me to take up their philosophy.
Allow me to set the scene: Time has stopped, and I have been teleported to an open area where the sun is bright shining, and there’s not a cloud in the sky. In front of me, there sits three famous philosophers that I am able to recognize, sitting upon a half-circle type of stone seating. There, they discuss philosophies – their own philosophies. Just in time, I arrive in need of a philosophy to take up myself.
Austin: “Where am I?”
Pyrrho: “Where do you think you are?”
Austin: “Well I don’t know. I figured I would ask the three people who seem to know where they are at.”
Pyrrho: “Do you really know where you’re at? Your senses could betray you.”
Epicurus: “Don’t be such a skeptic. You’ll get yourself killed. Just simply enjoy the pleasures of life and take it easy. Don’t worry about your hardships.”
Zeno: “We can agree on that, Epicurus. Don’t worry about what’s out of your control, son. Since you’re here for a while it seems, sit down and have a talk with us. We’d love to share our philosophies to you. What’s your name?”
Austin: “My name is Austin. Why am I here?”
Epicurus: “It seems this is a place for philosophical unrest. We can’t agree on which of ours is the best, and it seems you don’t have one yourself.”
Austin: “So I was randomly teleported here?”
Zeno: “You’d be a good philosopher yourself, kid. Always asking questions.”
Austin: “Funny. If I’m here to settle on a philosophy to adopt, then let’s hear your guys’.”
Pyrrho: “You said you recognized us, you tell us: What ARE our philosophies?”
(LH Ch. 3) Austin: “Okay, well you yourself are Pyrrho. You don’t think anything is real. You--”
Pyrrho: “Hey hey hey, I didn’t say that. I’m a skeptic. I don’t necessarily believe nothing is real, just that we can’t know if something is true for sure. How do we know our senses and our perception is 100% accurate? That could lead to disappointment. Don’t commit to anything and you won’t find yourself let down.”
Austin: “Wait, so if you don’t trust your senses, how do you feel pain? You would jump off a cliff?”
Pyrrho: “How can we know for sure? Appearances deceive, and we cannot know for sure the threat that the ‘appearance’ shows. I live in peace to an extent.”
(LH Ch. 5) Austin: “Well that doesn’t sound bad, except for the pain I know I’m going to experience. You DO sound rather maniacal though. Nonetheless, I do like the no worrying part, which brings me to you, Zeno. You’re the father of stoicism, something similar to Pyrrho.”
Zeno: “Don’t compare me to that lunatic. The man runs around crazy; he doesn’t fear storms or wild dogs. How is that even a philosophy? For me, it’s not that I don’t care about anything, it‘s that the point of my belief is not worrying about things you can’t control. The only comparison between me and that madman is I and my followers seek peace of mind. Anything can happen, and you cannot prevent that. The only controlling factor for a stoic is their attitude toward a situation.”
Austin: “Alright, well what about something major, like death?”
Zeno: “Even with big events, learn to let go. You do not have the ability to prevent or reverse that. Remain unmoved, and train yourself on resilience to things out of your control. Emotions cloud our sensible judgement, and should be removed wherever possible.”
Austin: “Kind of like learning to endure your hardships and not let them get you down?”
Zeno: “There you go kid, now you’re catching on.”
Austin: "I like that. That doesn't sound too bad. I wouldn't want to risk shutting the world out entirely, though."
Epicurus sits, calmly. He waits for his turn, but is also enjoying the time spent with three new friends – even if they can’t get along.
(LH Ch. 4) Austin: “Okay, well now onto you, Epicurus. You taught others to not fear death, for the constant fear of death causes stress and darkens your days. You say once you figure out to drop that common fear, things simple out and you can enjoy life.”
Epicurus: “Correct. Help yourself find happiness in life through the smoothest way available. We all seek pleasure, yes? More precisely, we seek avoidance from hardships. This is actually very simple. The key to life is to be kind to everyone and surround yourself with those who love you. Don’t work your life away. Live simple and make your needs basic, therefore you will never desire for more.”
Austin: “Simplicity is favorable, but death is scary. How can I not worry about that? What if there’s nothing after?”
Epicurus: “Why dwell on it? You won’t be there when it happens.”
Austin: “Valid point, I suppose. Alright, I think I am ready to side with one of you three.”
All three philosophers glared at him with curiosity. The boy outstretched his hand to one of them, and as they made contact, he was suddenly awoken back in the present day.
Philosophers in the rain
No contest, if you ask me. Like Jefferson, "I too am an Epicurean"* of sorts. (Might be interesting to ask Epicurus what he thinks about having influenced important historical figures so long after his own time, whether he agrees with Jefferson's blistering criticism of Plato, etc.)
ReplyDeleteBut Zeno makes some good points too. And I usually also call myself a stoic pragmatist. Wonder what Zeno might say about that?
This is fun. Looking forward to the final draft. Don't forget to put in some links etc.
* http://www.csun.edu/~hcfll004/jefflet.html#:~:text=As%20you%20say%20of%20yourself,and%20Rome%20have%20left%20us.&text=The%20merit%20of%20his%20philosophy%20is%20in%20the%20beauties%20of%20his%20style.
Pyrrho the piromaniac: my new favorite mnemonic! (Better even than Pyrrho the pirannha)
Delete