What It Really Means to Grow Up: Freedom, Responsibility, and Independent Thinking in the Modern World

 

Sabin Bharati : Section 2

In the book, Susan Neiman argues that modern society sends confusing messages about adulthood. What does it mean to be an adult? On one side, people are pressured to grow up early by finishing school, getting a job, being independent, and meeting society’s expectations. On the other hand, society also preaches staying childlike, avoiding responsibility, and focusing on pleasure, consumption, and the environment. So, what does it mean to be real adult?

According to the author, growing up doesn’t mean reaching a certain point or earning money. It’s a moral and intellectual goal. To support her argument, she uses philosophers like Kant and Rousseau to showcase that growing up means thinking from your own mind rather than getting influenced by preconceived notions. Hence, a person may not have grown up even after reaching old age, because he was never able to think for himself.

What gives meaning to a child? Is freedom we as children have enough to make us happy? Does this freedom give them meaning? According to author, it’s hard for a child to have meaning in modern world. She gives example of past, when Samoa children had responsibility from little age. After growing up at a certain age, children would look after small young children. Adolescents explored relationships and sexual development. In medieval Europe, children weren’t considered distinct until 12^th century. Hence, they would have to be involved in work for their family. Even my parents used to tell me how children used to work in agricultural land in past when there was no school. Even though life was hard for children back in the past, it had meaning because their action was making contribution to society. In modern life, children have much freedom. But the question is, is this freedom meaningful without contribution to society? Is it more meaningful to play with dolls or take care of real child?

How childhood differ in past and present?

Immanuel Kant:

The text also talks about enlightenment. Kant defines Enlightenment as ‘coming of age’, which means the ability of humans to think for themselves and make independent decisions. Kant expresses, “Enlightenment is humankind’s exit from self-incurred immaturity”.  We live in a society and establish values where we grow up and assume it’s to be true. But is it right?  Are we really enlightening? Will you become the same person if you were born in a different country? Would you have same values and concept of morality or idea of God? Probably not. Depending upon the place where a person is born, he would have different opinions of religion, costumes, morality, values and culture. These differences in environments make him choose path which seems to be correct. The reality is that based upon the environment where we have grown up, we would have similar ideas of what’s wrong and right and what’s real and what’s fake. Hence, if someone is influenced by the society where he lives, and his views toward world are rigid, he hasn’t grown up.

 

The philosophers Kant and Rousseau both explored how humans could achieve Enlightenment and problem with it, defining what it truly means to grow up and think for oneself. Kant believed humans are passive. They rely on others for guidance and rely on others to take decisions about their life. Often, we rely on our parents, teachers, religious leaders, and government to decide what’s wrong and right and follow habits and social norms given by society. Sometimes, some people tend to choose career based on people’s opinion rather than thinking by themselves. Kant famously wrote: “Sapere Aude!” which means dare to know. Kant emphasizes questioning whatever we have learned and see in society and making decisions with our own thinking rather than relying on people’s opinion. He believed education is a medium to enlightenment and education shouldn’t teach children what to think and what’s right and wrong, rather it should be able to make children how to think and make decision based on their own reasoning.

Jean-Jacques Rousseau:

While Rousseau agreed on the same idea of Kant regarding growing up, he believed in a different approach to reach that destination. Kant believed our laziness and fear was the major problem; however, Rousseau believed the biggest problem is society itself. He believed in raising children naturally so that they become independent without anybody’s intervention. He gives his method in ‘Emile, or On Education (1762)’ book. It’s a book that shows how to raise a child and he becomes a free, independent thinker. He believed we become slave of society before we can think as we become a part of a system society has created. According to him, rather than teaching what’s wrong and right to a child, it’s better to leave the child in a free natural environment and let them face the consequences and learn from that so that they can use their own reason from next time. It’s better for them to make mistakes and learn from them. However, he also didn’t completely believe that children should be left free. It’s about having a hidden teacher who would create an environment that would let the child learn from experience. This idea is self-contradictory because if someone controls children’s environment, how is child in natural free state?

This video explain Rousseau Emile:

 

In the present world, although we have a lot of freedom compared to the people in the past. If we take definition of enlightenment of Kant and Rousseau, it’s very difficult to grow up. We often follow trends and get ourselves into cell phones whenever we are free. Everyone has busy life because they have bills to pay, education loan to settle, money for kids’ tuition and every other daily struggle. These lefts no time for people to think for themselves. We go with the flow of time and never ask questions. Especially, children are given cell phones at young age and are on phone most of the times consuming content all day. This clearly hinders children from growing up, if we follow idea of Kant and Rousseau. 

Modern Challenges to Growing Up: Lessons from Jordan Peterson:

 

Ultimately, growing up is not just about reaching a certain age, getting a job and having kids, it’s also about being able to think for yourself and act independently. It’s about taking decisions by yourself without becoming dependent on any person. In today’s world, when there is a lot of responsibilities, obligations and distractions to face, it’s difficult to grow up. Still, if we show courage to question the world, take our own responsibility, leave prejudices and see world through our own independent vision, we will grow up.

The question to ask ourselves is, ‘Are you really growing up?’